The Buffalo Bills were already looking like one of the Super Bowl favorites entering the 2022 NFL offseason, and then they added eight-time Pro Bowl selection Von Miller to the team on a monster contract in March. Now, the Bills are *the* Super Bowl favorites, according to FanDuel.
So, the extremely enthusiastic Bills Mafia is understandably quite thrilled about Miller joining the team. The fans are even helping make sure the two-time Super Bowl champion is stocked up with premium toilet paper.
Wait, what?
Bills’ training camp is held at St. John Fisher University, more than an hour away from Buffalo in Pittsford, NY, and the team stays in the dorms there. This is the first time in Miller’s 12-year NFL career — previously spent with the Denver Broncos and Los Angeles Rams — that he’s had to stay in dorms for a training camp.
The star edge rusher noted how the dorm life has been an adjustment, and one of the things he mentioned is how “the toilet paper’s different.” Via The Buffalo News:
“Again, I’m 33 years old and toilet paper’s different,” he said. “The beds are different. There’s no TV in the dorm room. It’s a little bit different. You’ve got to make up your bed and change it and do all of that stuff every day. It takes some getting used to, but I’m all for it.”
Well, Bills Mafia heard Miller’s toilet paper concerns, and they’re making sure he’s stocked up with high-quality wiping material.
Miller told the media on Thursday that Bills fans have been sending him a ton of toilet paper and wipes after his comments:
“I said something about the toilet paper, and four days later, I got all types of toilet paper. In the mail, in wipes, and plant-free wipes from all types of fans.
Honestly, I just put them in the locker room; it was great. I wasn’t trying to complain. I was just saying that my experience being in the dorms, like, 33… then you come in, and there are just so many things that are different. I just said, hey, the toilet paper’s different, and boom- boxes on boxes on boxes of toilet paper and wipes and stuff. Everybody’s just trying to make my stay here a whole lot easier. I just want to say publicly that I appreciate all of you guys and I’m grateful.”
So, Miller can now poop in peace, thanks to the efforts of Bills Mafia.
Related: Bills’ shirtless rookies sing Backstreet Boys at training camp
About Matt Clapp
Matt is an editor/writer at The Comeback and Awful Announcing.
He can be reached by email at mclapp@thecomeback.com.